A Tearful Thanksgiving 2015

            When I was looking back through my notebooks, I found a writing from last Thanksgiving. I had forgotten some of my feelings from that holiday. I wonder what this year’s celebration will bring.  

A Tearful Thanksgiving 2015

Rebecca Carpenter

Rejoice always. Pray without ceasing. In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus toward you. (1 Thessalonians 5: 16-18 WEB)

            Tears slid down my face. After two years without Mother and Alan and three without Dad, I thought the day would be easier. But grief gripped me in a stronghold.

            Slick advertisements littered my counter. Each one urged readers to cut short holiday festivities to shop on Thanksgiving instead of spending time with family and friends left at home. Didn’t they realize the important gifts were sitting at home?

            Shelves of family pictures in my office, computer images of family times scrolled across my screen and memories reminded me of those who would no longer sit at our table.

            After my family moved to Florida, we all gathered at my parents’ home for holidays. Mother enjoyed cooking and entertaining. We gathered around several tables to eat and visit.

            After Mother’s health declined, Alan and I hosted family Thanksgiving dinners. We prepared the turkey together. He carved while I prepared other dishes. Everyone brought delicious food to add to the meal. It was fun having everyone at our new home.

            Even though Thanksgiving is a time of thankfulness, we had several difficult Thanksgivings. When I was eleven, my dad received a call during dinner that his dad passed away unexpectedly.

            The year we moved to Florida, on Thanksgiving we knew my maternal grandmother was near death. She died the following day.

            On other occasions, loved ones missed the annual celebration. A husband in Viet Nam. A son in the US Navy. Work schedules.

             One year, as soon as my parents arrived at our home, the phone rang. Because of a terrible automobile accident, my nephew was near death in ICU. With little appetite, we ate a little before joining my brother and his family at the hospital.

            While I thought of my losses, I stared at the gray clouds beyond my patio. Tears continued to flow. Sadness overtook me. Then I noticed strips of blue in the lightening sky. Gradually, while clouds danced over the dark ones into a brilliant expanse of blue.

            Tears slowed. Thankfulness overcame some of my sadness. I tried to focus on blessings instead of losses.

            When I couldn’t face preparing a holiday dinner, my son’s family stepped in. Anne’s mom grieved the recent loss of her mother. Chris, Anne, and three daughters brought joy to the meal.

            For millions of people around the world, what I have left is much more than they could ever imagine. A loving family embraces me. Friends support me. An abundance of food. A comfortable home. Plentiful clothes. Travel opportunities. Good health. Peaceful country. Right to worship. Freedom. My list could go on and on.

            At first, giving thanks in everything seemed impossible but isn’t. I am thankful for all that I now have and have had. I am trying to concentrate on what remains.

Dear Lord, no matter the circumstances, help us be thankful for what we still have. I especially pray for anyone who has empty chairs at the table. Amen

Touches of Light

With every sun’s rising, surprise us with Your love, satisfy us with Your kindness. Then we will sing with joy and celebrate every day we are alive. (Psalm 90: 14 The Voice)

            Dark clouds covered the sky like a gigantic pan of yeast rolls. Strips of light gray separated the mounded blobs. Just as rolls wait to rise, the clouds remained still until the sun rose above the horizon.

            Across the lake, two spots of pale orange showed through low tree branches. Birds awoke and sang a morning song. Pink and white flowers emerged from the darkness. Cool breezes rippled the water. I searched for bits of pink behind the forest.

            The mass of gray could dampen my mood or remind me that clouds create the most spectacular sunrises. Each day choices are made. I can choose to focus on my problems or search for spots of light found even in the midst of turmoil.

            Daily entries in journal of thanks helps me deal with the messy parts of life. This week was full.

            A memorial birthday

            Flowers and more flowers

            A week of birthday celebrations with family and friends

            A counter of birthday cards

            Birthday gifts

            Calls, emails, and text messages

            The morning clouds, which initially blocked the sun, reminded me to choose thankfulness even in the trials.

Creator, thank you for the clouds and the sunrises. Amen

            

Awestruck by Pink

Take great joy in the Eternal: His gifts are coming and they are all your heart desires. (Psalm 37: 4 The Voice)

            Awesome. Spectacular. Magnificent. No word could adequately describe the awe inspiring sunrise.

            Within five minutes, a tiny spot of red burst into a glorious panorama of pink. The breathtaking display encircled the lake. My pen refused to write. My books remained closed. I could only stare at the beauty of God’s creation. Never had I seen such a radiant sunrise.

            I longed for it to remain for the day. But within ten minutes, only a trace of rose survived in the gray sky. Though brief, the sunrise reminded me of God’s power, creativity, and love. He painted the sky and also takes care of the details of my life.

            Like my special sunrise, some people burst into my life, left precious memories and disappeared too quickly. How thankful I am for each dawn and every person who touched my life.

Creator, thank you for the awesome gifts you give. Amen