Easter Crosses

“I tell you the truth, a time is approaching when you will weep and mourn while the world is celebrating. You will grieve, but that grief will give birth to great joy.” 

John 16: 20 The Voice

No longer could I watch crosses form on the trees. For eight years, at our home in Lake Forest, brown crosses appeared on our pine trees every spring. Each year near Easter, new growth at the end of the boughs produced amazing crosses.  

At our new home, cypress trees line the bank near the patio but no pines. I miss watching the crosses form and reach toward heaven. I also miss the mallards, white ducks, egrets, herons, and turtles.

Besides moving this year, death brought more losses. First my dad last May and my husband Alan in January. Mother’s lingering illness and impending death magnifies my grief. All had been strong supporters for me.

Recently, tears come more often. Sadness stays longer. Grief holds tighter.

The gospel accounts of Jesus’ last night with his disciples and His betrayal showed his sadness. As he spent time with His followers, he knew what was coming. 

In the Garden of Gethsemane, He said, “My soul is overwhelmed with grief to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.” He walked a little farther and finally fell prostrate and prayed.  “Father, this is the last thing I want. If there is any way, please take this bitter cup from me. Not my will, but Yours be done.” Matthew 26: 38.

The Scriptures make me think of my own grief. I feel comfort knowing that Jesus grieved too. He felt pain but was obedient. He knew there would be suffering but after that joy. His home was not here but in heaven. 

Though my grief is consuming and heartbreaking at times, His example gives me encouragement and hope for the future.

In the fading light, I aim my binoculars on the pine trees across the lake. Excitement fills me. I see crosses pointing skyward. They were there all the time, but I had to look hard to find them. 

From my new patio, I have seen turkeys parade through my yard, two alligators coming to visit the lake, a flock of cormorants, wood storks, and resident cardinals. Though different from my previous home, the landscape and wildlife offer a new outlook.

Life will never be the same. My journey through grief requires me to search for moments of joy and embrace the changes. I will continue to miss what I have lost, but know God constantly provides for me.

The Easter crosses remind me of new life. Step by step I will venture down my new path. 

Father, lead me as I follow a new path. Help me find joy in the journey. Amen